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  • HEAVEN OR HELL

    One day while walking down the street a highly successful
    executive woman was tragically hit by a bus and she died. Her
    soul arrived up in heaven where she was met at the Pearly
    Gates by St. Peter himself.

    "Welcome to Heaven," said St.Peter. "Before you get settled
    in though, it seems we have a problem. You see, strangely
    enough, we've never once had an executive make it this far
    and we're not really sure what to do with you."


    "No problem, just let me in." said the woman.


    "Well, I'd like to, but I have higher orders. What we're
    going to do is let you have a day in Hell and a day in Heaven
    and then you can choose whichever one you want to spend an
    eternity in."


    "Actually, I think I've made up my mind...I prefer to stay
    in Heaven", said the woman.


    "Sorry, we have rules..." And with that St. Peter put the
    executive in an elevator and it went down-down-down to hell.
    The doors opened and she found herself stepping out onto the
    putting green of a beautiful golf course. In the distance was
    a country club and standing in front of her were all her
    friends - fellow executives that she had worked with and
    they were all dressed in evening gowns and cheering for her.
    They ran up and kissed her on both cheeks and they talked
    about old times. They played an excellent round of golf and
    at night went to the country club where she enjoyed an
    excellent steak and lobster dinner. She met the Devil who was
    actually a really nice guy (kinda cute) and she had a great
    time telling jokes and dancing. She was having such a good
    time that before she knew it, it was time to leave. Everybody
    shook her hand and waved good-bye as she got on the elevator.



    The elevator went up-up-up and opened back up at the Pearly
    Gates and found St. Peter waiting for her. "Now it's time to
    spend a day in heaven," he said. So she spent the next 24
    hours lounging around on clouds and playing the harp and
    singing. She had a great time and before she knew it her 24
    hours were up and St. Peter came and got her.


    "So, you've spent a day in hell and you've spent a day in
    heaven. Now you must choose your eternity," he said.


    The woman paused for a second and then replied, "Well, I
    never thought I'd say this, I mean, Heaven has been really
    great and all, but I think I had a better time in Hell."


    So St. Peter escorted her to the elevator and again she went
    down-down-down back to Hell. When the doors of the elevator
    opened she found herself standing in a desolate wasteland
    covered in garbage and Filth. She saw her friends were
    dressed in rags and were picking up the garbage and putting
    it in sacks. The Devil came up to her and put his arm around
    her. "I don't understand," stammered the woman, "yesterday I
    was here and there was a golf course and a country club and
    we ate lobster and we danced and had a great time. Now all
    there is a wasteland of garbage and all my friends look
    miserable."


    The Devil looked at her and smiled. "Yesterday we were
    recruiting you; today you're staff."
    -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

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