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  • WHY I FIRED MY SECRETARY

    One man explaining to another why he fired his secretary.
    "Two weeks ago," he said, "was my forty fifth birthday and I
    wasn't feeling too hot that morning anyway. I went into
    breakfast knowing that my wife would be pleasant and say
    "Happy Birthday" and probably have a present for me. She
    didn't even say "good morning" let along "Happy Birthday".


    I said "well that's wives for you", the children will
    remember. The children came into breakfast and didn't say a
    word. When I started to the office, I was feeling pretty low
    and despondent.


    As I walked into my office, Janet said "Good morning boss -
    Happy Birthday". I felt a little better, someone had
    remembered.


    I worked until noon. About noon she knocked on my door and
    said "You know it's such a beautiful day outside and it is
    your birthday, let's go to lunch, just you and I." I said
    "by George that is the greatest thing I have heard all day,
    lets go".


    We went to lunch. We didn't go where we normally go. We
    went out into the country to a little private place. We had
    two martinis and enjoyed lunch tremendously. On the way
    back to the office, she said "you know it's such a beautiful
    day, we don't have to go back to the office, do we?"


    I said "no, I guess not."


    She said "let's go to my apartment." We enjoyed another
    martini and smoked a cigarette, and she said "boss, if you
    don't mind, I think I'll go into the bedroom and slip into
    something more comfortable."


    I assured her I didn't mind at all.


    She went into the bedroom and in about five minutes she came
    out carrying a big birthday cake followed by my wife and
    children. All were singing "Happy Birthday" and there I sat
    with nothing on but my socks!

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